for middleoftheforce

[jedi_librettist]

Ben picked a seat in the corner of the galley. There was something homey and comforting about watching his brother cook. The last of the tension he'd carried melted away.

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[middleoftheforce]

He couldn't fix the look, but he was hopeful it might lessen

[jedi_librettist]

"I can just be Ben still, right? I don't have to be Ben Organa-Solo?"

[middleoftheforce]

"You can be whoever you want."

[jedi_librettist]

Ben sighed, closing his eyes. He wasn't ready to be lost son of two war heroes yet. He didn't know if he ever would be.

[middleoftheforce]

Nothing prepared to a person to be the son of two war heroes, Solo understood wanting to step away from it all.

[jedi_librettist]

It wasn't about stepping away because it was overwhelming. For almost a decade, his safety had depended on no one knowing where he came from or what he could do. It had gotten him taken in the first place.

He relaxed against the wall. A few minutes later, his breath became deeper and more even.

[middleoftheforce]

"You know you can go to a bunk."

It's said softly, reluctant to disturb.

[jedi_librettist]

There's no response. Ben's head tips forward after a few minutes.

[middleoftheforce]

Solo sighed. He could just drag his brother to a bunk? He wasn't sure the right choice over here.

[jedi_librettist]

There was no time to make a choice. Ben's breath started to come in sharp, near silent gasps. His face twisted in pain. His fingers twitched as their bond flooded with terror.

[middleoftheforce]

Solo sat up, rigid.

"Ben. Ben wake up."

[jedi_librettist]

Ben didn't react. Images drifted into the bond. A gold collar with a chain. A cup of some vile drink pressed to his lips. Kneeling in front of a familiar bounty hunter, wincing from the hand pulling his hair. A hot knife tracing a pattern above his hip.

[middleoftheforce]

Solo swallowed heavily, eyes screwing shut as if it would stop the images appearing. He tried pushing back through the bond, yelling at his brother to waken up.

[jedi_librettist]

Ben didn't wake up and the nightmare didn't stop but he clung to his twin through the bond, reaching for the comfort he hadn't had when everything had actually happened. Shame colored the fear. "You don't think you're special just because your masters shares his food with you. You know better, don't you, slave prince?"

[middleoftheforce]

There was rage boiling, and a desire to go back into the cockpit, turn the ship around and go shoot down any of those 'masters' he had left alive. He pushed it down, buried the thought. He needed to focus on Ben

Wake up!

[jedi_librettist]

Ben felt the rage through the bond. Everything coming from him stopped,the bond growing cold as he woke up.

"Sorry. That was rude."

[middleoftheforce]

"... Sleeping wasn't rude. Having nightmares isn't rude."

His voice was firm.

[jedi_librettist]

Ben gave him a look as if to ask what nightmare was being talked about.

"Falling asleep here and now was "

[middleoftheforce]

An irritated noise. Oh great, they were going to be playing that game, were they?

"Nope. Wasn't."

[jedi_librettist]

Of course they were. Horrific nightmares werent something you admitted to having.

"Mom wouldn't be happy."

[middleoftheforce]

There was a shrug.

"Trust me, you're not gonna be the family disappointment."

[jedi_librettist]

Ben shrugged, not meeting his twin's eyes.

[middleoftheforce]

"Ben..."

He wasn't sure what to say, and just sent reassuring feelings through the bond.

[jedi_librettist]

Ben didn't openly react. Even in the bond, he seemed muted. His twin didn't know what he'd done over the last fourteen years.

[middleoftheforce]

His twin didn't care. They'd both done stuff. There was a lot of shit he wasn't going to talk about ever.